Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Mel On...When Things Don't Go As Planned...

Today was my last big run before Athens and it was supposed to be 20 miles long.  Supposed to be.

However, a series of mistakes and unforeseen events changed that plan several times both before and during the run.  I was really excited about this one too but as soon as I realized that things weren't going as planned I tried to refocus and restrategize; but, alas, there was no hope for what was about to happen.

**Spoiler Alert**
Probably delving into a little TMI 
but I promised myself not to sugar-coat my experiences...
so here's me keeping it real, ya'll



I woke up this morning really pumped and ready to run.  I hadn't ran in the last 4 days so I felt like a caged animal at this point.  I was ready TO GO.  Rocky tee laid out and everything.  Then I woke up at 4am to a downpour.  Crappidy, crappidy, crap, crap, crap.

Okay, okay, I'll just go to the gym and bust things out but I couldn't fall back asleep thinking of doing 20 miles ON A DREADMILL.  Trying to pysch myself into it, I just told myself it would be less than 4 episodes of Grey's Anatomy.  Grey's, yes!  I'll watch Grey's.  So as soon as my husband's alarm went off I bombarded him with demands (I know nothing about downloading shows to an iPad).  Let's just say he was less than pleased but he did download a few of them.  Love him and his ridiculous knowledge of all things electronic!

However, as luck would have it, the weather cleared up somewhat nicely by the time I dropped my daughter off at school so I decided I would run outside instead.  Two girls from my running group where running in a village close to me so I met them there.  One was going to show us a new 9 mile loop and the other had an 18 miler to do so it seemed that it would work out great.  We'd run a new trail, stop back at the car to refresh, then head back out for the normal loops....perfect, right?

NO.  These girls are amazing, sweet as can be, and so very friendly....however, they are also very fast....VERY, VERY FAST.

I had to chuckle to myself because I just finished reading this book Saturday.  There is a part where the author is talking about how he went on his first group run with the Kenyans and he couldn't keep up but with the very last two female runners.  They were going up a hill toward the end and he was about to quit and one of the girl's turned around to him and simply said "try" and it gave him enough motivation to finish the run.  These were my Kenyans.

So, "try" was my motto every time I wanted to break back.  Try, Mel.  Try.  If last week's long run was a fun run, this week's long run was definitely a training run.  No music, definitely no conversational or sing-song pace, and nothing to do but focus form and not dry-heaving, I mean breathing.  I did well the first 9 mile loop. Even though we ran well above my normal long-run pace, I pretty much kept up the whole way and I didn't stop and walk like I wanted to oh-so-many times.

I even found out that one of the girls was also running in Athens!  Wahoo!  Then she told me that she was pushing her finishing goal back to 5 hours because of the 20 miles uphill we'd have to do.  What the hay bags?!  Here I am hoping to make it in under the 8 hour cut-off and she's all like I'll do 5 since I only started training 10 weeks ago.  I've been training for 5 months.  And, I'm not even touching that 20 mile uphill comment, but now I really have to check the course map again.  Oh, boy....breathe...

After that 9 mile loop (and startling realization) things started to change pretty quickly.  One, I had to pee like a racehorse by the time we got back to the car.  Luckily, they hadn't moved my hay bale so I went over and took care of that.  But, I forgot that I didn't have any GU or bananas with me and I was really looking forward to those bad boys after that loop.  Thankfully, I at least had some raisins and dried apricots in my gym bag.  I'm scarfing those down when one of the girl's hears me cussing myself out for not coming prepared for a 20 MILE RUN and gives me some of her energy chews.  YES!  I've never had Shot Bloks before but they were delicious and seemed to help my energy....for a while that is...

We make it through one more 5-mile loop and I'm feeling sore.  My abs are aching and my right hip is giving me a fit so I stop a few times to stretch things out but this time we are going more at my pace.  Then it starts sprinkling and I feel a blister coming on the inside of my left heel...and ARG!

One more loop, one more loop.  I pop another Shot Blok but this time my tummy started feeling a little funny.  I know the rule that you are not supposed to try something new on a long run/race; but, I have a pretty strong stomach when it comes to things like that so I didn't even think of it bothering me in that way.  Just like I didn't think anything of ordering extra spicy Indian food the night before either.  [FYI, I love spicy food.  If it doesn't make my head sweat and my nose run it is NOT spicy enough.  I once had a Mexican guy tell me I didn't eat like a white girl, that I ate like an Indian man (not sure how to take that, but I just really, really like spicy food)].  Besides, it's never bothered my stomach before so why should I worry now?  Oh right, because you've never ate Indian food and attempted to run TWENTY miles before, Mel...

Let's just say half-way through that loop things started spiraling downhill pretty quickly.  My head started hurting and I couldn't tell if my abs were cramping because of the run, because it was that time of the month (hey, I warned you about the TMI), or because I was fixing to crap my pants.  I was 99% sure it was because I was fixing to crap my pants.  CRAP.

Don't worry, I didn't do it.  I almost did but I didn't. Running the remaining miles of a long run are hard enough on a good day, but try doing it after running with the "Kenyans," and while clenching your butt checks together for the last 2.5 miles so you don't poop everywhere.  NEVER AGAIN.  Traumatized for life, this one.

Needless to say, as soon as I got to my car I flew home.  I  was supposed to do another mile but that wasn't happening.  I squeaked out a goodbye to the girl running with me and jumped into my car.  I didn't even stretch (which is killing me now).  Then, I just got mad because not only did I have to race home to take care of business but I also had 30 minutes to shower and change to go pick up my daughter from school, then go grocery shopping, then pick my son up from the bus stop, then clean my house, do laundry, and cook dinner.

Do you know what the Kenyans do after a long run (the real Kenyans)?  They eat, sleep, and rest until their next scheduled run.  THAT IS IT.  Eat, sleep, run, repeat.  Seriously, the ones who are considered athletes are not allowed to work because it takes too much energy and some even go to special camps where they can just run, rest, get massaged, and not have to worry about anything.  No wonder they have won 19 of the last 23 Boston Marathons (and that is just one race)!

Anyway, although I was really, REALLY happy I didn't crap my pants today, I was also really, really bummed that I didn't do the full 20.  Maybe one day I will be a "Kenyan," but today was not my day.  It may never be my day but that's okay too.  I'll keep trucking.  Eventually we all get to the finish line....and to the bathroom...


Pics from the new trail:

The weather had cleared up and was looking too good to pass up!

Perfect way to start a run!

Blurry...why yes, but that is what happens
when you are running at the speed of light...







1 comment:

  1. You are so wonderfully, hilarious, and unique! Love you.

    ReplyDelete